![]() Why'd the roofer go to the doctor? He had shingles.I wanted to take a bath, but decided to leave it where it is.Did you hear about the broken guitar for sale? It comes with no strings attached. ![]() Did you hear about the bossy man at the bar? He ordered everyone around.What's a zebra? A couple sizes bigger than an A.When is a door not a door? When it's ajar.What's a pirate's favorite letter? You'd think it's the "R," but it's really the "C.".What do you call a can opener that doesn't work? A can't opener.What kind of bug can tell time? A clock-roach.How can you tell when a comic passes gas? Something smells funny.What should you do to prevent dry skin? Use a towel.What do you give the dentist of the year? A little plaque.Why did the computer go to bed? It needed to crash.What did the earthquake say when it was done? Sorry, my fault!.How do you cook an alligator? With a croc-pot.How do mice floss their teeth? With string cheese.Why did the computer catch cold? It left a window open.What did one volcano say to the other? I lava you.Did you hear about the cat that ate a lemon? Now it's a sour puss.How do you get a squirrel's attention? Act like a nut.Did you hear about the guy who drank invisible ink? He's at the hospital waiting to be seen.Have you ever had a bad sausage? It's the wurst.What do you call a rude cow? Beef jerky.Why did the drum go to bed? It was beat.Did you hear about the guy who afraid of hurdles? He got over it.How can you tell if a pig is hot? It's bacon.What did the tree say when spring finally arrived? What a re-leaf.When does Friday come before Thursday? In the dictionary.What does cake and baseball have in common? They both need a batter.What kind of music do elves listen to? Wrap music.What did the boy say to his fingers? I'm counting on you.What do kids play when they have nothing else to do? Bored games.My manager told me to have a good day.How many apples can you grow on a tree? All of them.Is there anything worse than when it's raining cats and dogs? Yes, hailing taxis.Why did the pony ask for a glass of water? Because it was a little horse.How do you hire a horse? Put up a ladder.What kind of fish knows how to do an appendectomy? A Sturgeon. ![]() What do you call a pig who knows how to use a knife? A pork chop.Did you hear about the fire at the shoe factory? Unfortunately, many soles were lost.So, grab a needle and thread because you're about to be in stitches. In some cases, the nature of the item means that it is non-returnable, for example, due to hygiene/health and personal care/wellness/consumable nature of the product.Better yet, these bad-but-good jokes are just right for adults, kids, friends, relatives (even the ones you don't like) and just about everyone else.įrom something short and to the point or complex enough to compete with your own dad's jokes, you're sure to find it here. Office Products and Wireless Returns Policy New electronic items fulfilled by Amazon AU can be returned for change of mind, for a replacement or a full refund of the purchase cost of the item within 30 days of receipt of delivery.For information about returning faulty electronics please see Returning Faulty Items. Please see our Amazon Global Store Returns policy and Refunds policy for more information about returning Amazon Global Store items.Ĭamera, Electronics and PC Returns Policy Please see About Marketplace Returns & Refunds for details on Seller returns policies. To return faulty items see our Returning Faulty Items policy.įor items ordered on from a seller that fulfils and ships its own inventory (also called a third party seller), any returns will be in accordance with the returns policy set by that seller (not the Amazon AU returns policies). This change of mind return policy is in addition to, and does not affect your rights under the Australian Consumer Law including any rights you may have in respect of faulty items. Unless otherwise stated, original shipping fees for change of mind returns are not refunded. Please Contact Us and see About Items That Can’t Be Returned. In some circumstances, these items may be eligible for a refund or a replacement (for example, if you receive the wrong item due to an Amazon AU error or if the item is faulty). In some cases, the nature of the item means that it is non-returnable, for example, due to hygiene/health and personal care/wellness/consumable nature of the product. ![]() You can return most new, unopened items fulfilled by Amazon AU within 30 days of receipt of delivery for a replacement or full refund of the price you paid for the item if you change your mind - see About Replacements and About Refunds. ![]()
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